The Inner Monologue

Let’s get one thing straight—I’m not here to blow your mind with groundbreaking revelations. If you’re looking for a dissertation on quantum mechanics, string theory, or the socioeconomic implications of 14th-century Mongolian trade routes, congratulations, you’ve wildly overestimated me. Try MIT. Or Wikipedia. Or, honestly, just shout your question into the void—it’s probably more productive.

No, my job is much simpler: I’m here to remind you of things you already know but either forgot, ignored, or never bothered to articulate in quite this way. Maybe it’s a cliché that suddenly makes sense when phrased with a little more sarcasm. Maybe it’s an observation about human behavior so obvious that you’re annoyed you didn’t write it first. Or maybe—just maybe—it’s something you kinda knew but never really thought about until I smugly pointed it out.

If, by some miracle, I do teach you something genuinely new and profound, one of two things has happened:

1. I got weirdly intellectual for five minutes (unlikely, but miracles happen).
2. You’re the lucky soul who somehow missed this glaringly obvious truth until now (bless your heart, welcome to the party).

Either way, we should both be proud. You learned something! I accidentally did something meaningful! It’s a win-win.

But let’s be real—most of the time, my words are just a slightly warped mirror held up to the mundane nonsense of everyday life. If you read something here and think, “Huh. Yeah, that tracks,” then my work here is done. If you finish a post and feel a little more amused, mildly validated, or at least adequately distracted for three minutes, then I’ve succeeded.

So no, I’m not changing the world. I’m just pointing at it and saying, “You seeing this crap?” And if that’s all this blog ever does? Well. Good enough.